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We are continually updating and adding to the information on this page.
BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS THROUGH COMMUNICATION The
individuals we work with not only need to learn new skills (how to brush their teeth, plan a nutritional meal, wash their
clothes, etc.) but also need to develop more positive attitudes towards the people around them. They must
learn to like themselves, develop a feeling of self confidence. They need to know that someone likes and
cares about them. They must feel successful and be able to say, "Hey look what I did!" If they do not feel good
about themselves, then teaching them new skills will seem to be nearly impossible. The responsibility for helping
the individuals we work with develop good feelings about themselveslies with the people who support them.
"As a person who provides direct support," you can accomplish this responsiblity by developing a positive
relationship with the individual by your words and actions, "I like you", "You are a worthwhile
person", " I know you can do it." We need to RESPECT AND VALUE the individuals we work with.
They have likes/dislikes, needs, wants, etc. just like anyone else. In order to identify these and help that person learn
to fill them we must develop a relationship with that individual. Remember--We are here to help "each person"
develop their potential as an individual (i.e., We don't build products. We build relationships
and relationships build people!!) Some of the tools we can use to do this are: 1. CONCENTRATE ON THE INDIVIDUAL'S STRENGTHS:
a. When you are with the individuals, talk about what they can do, don't dwell on what they cannot do. b. What are their positive points?
c. What can you and the individual do to furthur develop these positive points? 2. PRAISE THE INDIVIDUAL Praise
the individuals for the good things they do. Do not assume they know what they are doing is correct. Praise
builds self-confidence. The more things they know they can do, the more they will try. Don't forget to praise attempts
even if they are not successful--praise the fact that they tried. Use the individual's name when praising him/her. Let
them know it is they, as individuals, you are praising. When you praise someone base it on his/her likes. Likes are the things
a person chooses to do or have, that they are willing to work for, and will get obvious pleasure from (places, events, people,
food, objects). 3. BE AWARE OF YOUR VERBAL AND NON-VERBAL ACTIONS: Some
of the strongest communication we give is through our non-verbal actions, (eye contact, gestures, body language, looks, expressions
and body contact). People will pick up on these things and act accordingly.
a. Are you warm, friendly, and interested? b.
Do you yell at the individual?
c. Do you look angry? d.
Are you afraid of the individual?
e. Do you look bored? 4. TREAT THE PERSON AS A PERSON: a. How many times do you
find yourself giving orders saying, "Do this, Do that." or, maybe more frequently, "don't
do that." Each time you do this, you are really telling someone they cannot do anything for him/herself and
you are talking that person's control from them. No one can learn independence or self-confidence or trust if someone
continually orders them around. It takes away the opportunity to build relationships with people. b.
Try saying, "Could you help me with this? "I think this a good idea, how about you?"
c. Give choices whenever possible. Don't we all like to have some control over our own lives? 5. Never
talk about an individual in front of him/her as if he/she isn't there. If you must discuss a person, involve him/her in
the conversation with you. a. How can this be done in planning
meetings? 6. Never
talk about an individual's shortcomings in front of other individuals present. Reserve any discussion for a time when
others are not around or when the person can be involved in the discussion (problem solving) 7. Never talk about
an individual's problems or shortcomings you work with/for to any person who is not profesionally involved with that person. USE THESE TOOLS TO POSITIVLEY BUILD RELATIONSHIPS
AND YOU MAY BE AMAZED AT THE OUTCOME!!!!!! Following are teaching methods that can be used when incorporating Positive Behavior
Techniques. Reinforcers such
as a toy, candy, game, free time and especially praise can motivate them and help them focus on the desired behavior.
Typical children often do chores to earn allowance or privileges. Things such as talking, dressing and eating that would
not be "work" for a typical child can very hard work and stressful for an autistic child. When these basic
skills are being introduced to the child reinforcers can be used in the beginning. The reinforcers begin to fade once
the desired skill become easier for the child. Errorless
Teaching is used when introducing a child to a new concept. An example would be when teaching a child the
color red the teacher would show the child the color red and ask, "What color is this?" Then the teacher would
immediately say "Red". Over time the teacher would delay saying the answer to give the child a chance
to respond. Children may need to to have as long as a minute or so to say the answer as long as the child
does not get frustrated during this time. Hand-over-hand
is used when the teacher is helping the child get the concept of what is wanted. It can also be used to facilitate what
is wanted when the child understands but is reluctant . If the goal is for the child to put one block on top of the
other, to introduce the goal, the teacher would cup the child's hand in hers and with the child, place the block on top
of the other. If the goal is for the child to pick up the toys and the child understands what is wanted but is reluctant
the teacher could do the same technique. If the child physically resists then another method should be used. This technique
as well as any technique can never be done with anger on the part of the teacher. Modeling is when the teacher demonstrates what is wanted. The expectation
is that the child will imitate what was done. The provider's enthusiasm can help gain the child's interest.
Chaining is a teaching technique that breaks a task into very small steps. Each step is then taught
in sequeance. Forward chaining teaches the steps from beginning of the task to the end. Backward or reverse
chaining teaches steps from the end of the task to the beginning. This technique is good for repetitive tasks that
can be worked on over time. ex: Child is learning to brush his
teeth, but he shows frustration trying to remember everything. The caregiver breaks down the task into steps, such as
picking up the toothbrush, wetting the brush, putting toothpaste on the brush, etc. The caregiver starts with having the
child pick up the brush. When this is mastered, the next step is taught. Then as step one and two are put
together the child is ready to add step three. Giving positive reinforcement will add encouragement and increase the
child's interest in learning the task. *Disclaimer: The above collection of information is ACCENT on Family
Care Services' interpretation of information that has come from experience, training and research. Most
of the information comes from The State of Arizona's Division of Developmental Disabilities' Home and Comunity
Based Skill Building Training Manual. This information is intended for the use of ACCENT and those associated with ACCENT. This
information is not conclusive and is not meant to take the place of information from professionals.
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